The Art of Giving …
by Rochman Reese and Sofan Chan
The true Art in Giving is to give from the heart without any expectation of a return.
True giving comes from the same place inside you as your deepest happiness. They are inexplicably intertwined.
A gift is something that is enjoyed twice. First by the giver who revels in the pleasure of giving something special and then also enjoyed by the person who receives the gift.
A very special form of giving takes the form of small, personal acts of kindness. Very often it is not money or belongings that people need, it’s the things that can’t be seen, such as advice reassurance, a kind word, compliments or a smile.
The act of giving doesn’t have to be limited to an exchange of presents at Christmas time or Birthdays. You can treat every person you come into contact with as someone who you can give a gift to.
You may be a bit sceptical, wondering what exactly do you have to give? Everybody has something of value for another person. It could be a kind word, a simple smile, some appreciation, the sharing of some special knowledge, even a helping hand or a bit of support during a difficult emotional time.
You have something to give everyone.
The act of true giving is something wonderful and amazing. With most things in this world, there is only a limited amount of what you can give away. Fortunately, generosity and kindness are not bound to these same material limitations.
One of life’s most basic laws is “every single act of love, kindness and generosity will multiply and return to you many times over “. The more you give the happier you will feel.
Many thousands of years ago a great sage in Babylon said “The reward of charity depends entirely upon the extent of the kindness in it.”
It is one of life’s wonderful paradoxes that you limit the power of your giving by having an expectation of getting something in return. When you give without any thought or desire for something back, your returns will be truly limitless.
Your life is like a river of energy, continually flowing. What happens when a river stops moving? It get very muddy, and stagnant. A fast flowing river is full of life and clear water. Where would you rather drink?
The acts of giving and receiving are a continuos process of circulation that continues the flow of your life’s energies. For one person to receive someone else has to give. It’s a cycle of energy that flows continually onwards.
Pause for as moment as you read this, and take a big, deep breath. Hold it for as long as you possibly can. As you hold it inside, notice how uncomfortable you begin to feel when you are holding on to something that is meant to be released.
Now, breath out, completely and hold your breath with your lungs fully emptied. Feel how uncomfortable you feel when you are resisting taking in something that you need.
True giving, without expectation of anything in return is as effortless as breathing.
How often do you expect back from the person you gave something to a gift of a similar or greater value? Is this true giving or merely an unvoiced expectation of an exchange of similar goods?
Have you ever heard anyone saying ” I just give and give and give until I have nothing left “?
This behaviour has many other names. Self denial, self pity, martyrdom, self righteousness to name just a few.
This is an ego based form of giving. It is giving with an expectation of something in return. In reality, this is not giving at all but an unvocalised form of barter. If, through the act of giving, you feel that you have “lost something or are somehow lessened” then the gift was not truly given from your heart.
Truly giving something from the heart is an action which will fill your life with joy. This is where the expression to “give whole heartedly” comes from.
The intention behind your giving is the most important thing. The intention should always be to create happiness for both the giver and the receiver
If you experience resentment and a feeling of “I don’t really want to give this to this person, but I feel that I have to” or “I really should give them something,” this is probably what ultimately will come back to you. Perhaps in this case, you need to consider not giving the gift at all !
What you give out is what comes back in direct proportions to the feelings you have in the act of giving.
It’s very simple. If you want to experience more joy, give joy to others, if you want more love, learn to give love, if you want attention and appreciation, learn to give appreciation to others. These are some of life’s most precious gifts and they don’t cost you anything.
When you meet someone, you can silently send them a blessing, wishing them happiness, joy and laughter. This kind of silent giving is very powerful. Do this, (with no thought of return) and you will suddenly find people around you opening to you in joy and happiness.
Make a descision that wherever you go, to whoever you meet, to give. As long as you are giving, you will also be receiving. The more you give, the more will flow back to you and be returned many times over. Giving creates a pattern of happiness, joy and love in your life beyond your wildest expectations.
In ancient China, Lao Tsu wrote “Kindness in words creates confidence. Kindness in thinking creates profoundness. Kindness in Giving Creates Love.”
May your life be filled with love, happiness and inspiration
Rochman Reese and Sofan Chan
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